i have galaxies growing inside of me
"They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for."

Tom Bodett

(Source: quotethat, via saintleonard)

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"Sunshine all the time makes a desert"

Arab proverb

(Source: dounia-algeria, via blowyourownjob)

jesus fucking christ its been so long since ive taken a selfie i forgot how bad quality my webcam is but yeah lol just playing dress ups in my room i think i would describe this aesthetic as hippy goth or something lol i kind of want to dye my hair white blonde and only wear black…. but i also love wearing colourful patterns and having purple or green hair oh the dilemmas!!!

continuing on with my rant lets go from a psychological point of view to a more mathematical direction. a lot of people seem to complain about having no money and wonder how i manage to afford rent and plane tickets etc.

so lets say on any given fortnight you need to update your wardrobe to keep looking ‘fresh’ (these prices are guesstimates could probs be a lot more depending on how rare these clothes are)

bucket hat or 5 panel to hide your stupid head $30

exclusive long sleeve from streetx or wherever else you buy them $50

sweet ass fresh kicks $100 (and these are probably cheap ones) 

bumbag to keep your drugs in $20

the swag you now have: priceless

now that you are looking hella cool its time to go clubbing!!!!!

entry to ambar, shape etc $15-20 (more if its a good dj)

the actual drugs $30-40 (or more if you’re gonna double drop boi)

a couple of drinks to get you even more crazy $20

after all that hectic dancing you are gonna want a kebab $10

now its 3am and you need a taxi home $30+

and here we are sunday morning feeling that comedown and wondering why our bank accounts are so empty! well from my maths your clothes and the partying on the weekend cost you about $300. you know what you could spend that money on instead? rent for a few weeks! plane tickets! festival tickets! if you take a break from buying new stuff and going hard on the weekends you could save enough to buy a car or a pet or a camera or something else really great!!! so think again about spending all your money on cool clothes and partying… its just a bunch of businesses luring our poor young souls into wasting all our money away on things we dont need when we could be saving it to see the world and doing creative things!!! i cant force anyone to change their lives and the way they spend their money but i think its very wise to be less materialistic and have goals and plans about what you want to do in the future!!!!!! thankyou for reading lmao bye

bahahahaha this photo from the weekend basically explains how i felt about going out clubbing. it used to be one of my favourite things to do but now i just cringe most of the time i even go near a club. i keep feeling more and more dissociated from everyone around me and i dont know why. my generation seems to be all about bucket hats and those rare and exclusive long sleeves shirts and those expensive new balance shoes with the weird numbers and names im so out of the loop i dont even know what they are called. these kids are taking pingers nearly every weekend, acting like they are 100% mdma when in reality you would be lucky to get something 80% pure in perth. you can pretty much tell the drugs are cut with speed the way these people dance. and the way they dance is probably the most confusing part of all… im not sure if there is a name for it but they move their arms and legs in a really fast and crazy way. as i was walking through this club there would be 3 or 4 guys in a row coincidentally doing this crazy dance in sync… im not sure if they even realised how silly they looked. but i think the worst part of my generation is how social media is so important that some kids only seem to care about getting a photo at the club so it can be all over facebook and instagram. ive literally heard people complain about getting all dressed up and going out only to not even get a photo while they were at the club. this whole club photography thing didnt even exist a couple of years ago and now its all these clubbing kids care about. and if you get a photo in your bucket hat and long sleeve and fresh kicks with a vicks stick up your nose or a lollipop in your mouth you are the king of cool. i see these kids praising each other on facebook for having their pupils the size of the moon. now i must admit i am being a bit of a hypocrite here… i did like to dress up when i went out clubbing but i tried to stand out rather than look like a clone… and i did occasionally take drugs at club events but the last thing i would want is for my huge pupils to be all over the internet for everyone to see. since im only 19 i have no idea if clubbing has always been like this but im quite certain that the more dependent we are on social media the more we desire to be cool and popular so that everyone at the club and on the internet thinks we really are that great. i think thats why i admire events like yayo where they apparently dont let you get your phones out. so tell me all you want that you dont care about your appearance and all that but if you were to go to a club where there would be no photographer and you cant even snapchat the sick dj you are seeing… would you even bother to dress up as much? and would you have a better time seeing everything through your own eyes than the camera on your phone? the only people that would see you are the hundreds of other people getting sweaty in the dark and you would probably party like its 1995 or something… no iphone to let the internet know how much fun you are having at the club right now. i could go on but the last thing ill mention is how in reality clubs are just dark rooms with loud music and intoxicated people. and lets not forget these clubs are a business… so why exactly are we spending $20 every weekend to go into these places? we seem to just go there to feel confident enough to dance and hook up with people. the fact that going to a club sober is pretty fucking boring says a lot about how much ‘fun’ these clubs really are. i think this is why i prefer going to chilled out venues and seeing live music where you can be sober and still have the time of your life. maybe im a bit of loser but why cant we just go out in the sun and dance our heart away without the need for drugs? 
Anonymous: i hope i'm not rude but can i ask how much do you weigh and how tall are you? my body looks kinda similar to yours and i'm curious if we might weigh the same amount :)

last time i checked my weight it was like 50kg but it could be 60kg now idk because in my opinion FUCK SCALES. i wouldnt mind talking to someone in person about this maybe but i think the whole weight thing is silly like everyone is different i think comparing yourself to others is silly lets not do that okay :3

Anonymous: ur a hot babe, literally no one has the same body they had when they were 13!!!! seriously dude dont worry, it happens to everyone, embrace it, u look HOT xxxxxx

thankyou!!! im trying to embrace my body but idk i swear everytime i walk out the door i get triggered by all these skinny ass bitches and get hella sad but also dont wanna put myself thru hell to look like them. i just try to remind myself of the good things like having boobs and a nice butt and being able to eat all of the carbs i want and not giving a fuck :)